On the show, there's the Catholic Guy,
Who's humor is not very wry,
He's clever with banter,
But at Church… not the Cantor,
He's as sweet as banana cream pie.
On the show there's a girl called Maureen,
Who's a fair and fine Irish Colleen,
She's such a good sport,
With the guys in her court,
She sure tunes up this Catholic machine.
On the show there's a cute guy called Lou,
Who holds the hours together like glue,
He does great sound effects,
He helps avoid any wrecks,
In all, he's the ace of the crew.
Father Jim Chern
On the show there's great Father Jim Chern,
Who enjoys all the jokes he can earn,
He's cheery and good,
And from an Italian 'hood.
I love, when in the games, it's his turn.
Father Rob Keighron
On the show there's so young Father Rob,
Who's ready to laugh or to sob,
He's smart and sincere,
Like scotch or a beer,
He's part of the Catholic Guy mob.
On the show there's a sharp gal called Kayla,
Who makes every show into a gala,
Her music sure rocked,
Even if she gets mocked,
…and there's no other word to rhyme.
Anthony Buono from Ave Maria Singles
On the show there's a dating coach, Anthony Buono,Is this Pulitzer Prize-winning stuff, or what?
Who calls into the show on the phone-o,
(at which point Lino points out that Anthony always appears in studio, and Lino's Mom abruptly stops reading)